Actually this is something i have never really given much thought to until reading for a book written by robert green MASTERY . He elaborated this as one of the best strategies in developing social intelligence . The problems we face in our social area is our naive tendency to project to people our emotional needs and desire of the moments .
We misread peoples intentions , social intelligent is the ability to see people in the most realistic possible which require thinking inside and transforming our thoughts .
The ability to see ourselves the way people see us will enable us to transform and developing social intelligence in our own way . Almost all of us has some kind of a flaw ranging from one that is harmless to the one that can get us in trouble . If you are like me , it could be that you are too honest in crictism of other people which most time we really means well for them .
Sometime in my line of work i have to be honest with people and repeating this behaviour tend to get me in trouble . People rarely tell us what it is that we are doing wrong . They are afraid to cause conflict and it becomes very difficult to correct our flaws . Let alone correct them .
To see ourselves objectively , we can begin by looking at negatives event in our life, people sabotaging our work , bosses fire us for no logical reasons .This process will enable us to correct our flaws . This will also allow us to see the role we play in our own mistakes .
Slowly in this way we can develop increasing self – detachment , which will yield us the ability to see ourselves as we really are .